My tribe

May 6, 2011

I have the tremendous opportunity to mother my young children without the need for full time childcare.  I cherish this role as I have grown immensely from it. As with any time-worthy-experience will have, there are challenges.

December 22, 2010

I survived round-the-clock nursing, sleepless nights, temper tantrums, sibling conflicts, nap time/meal time/bed time routines, etc. I felt accomplished and was super proud of myself. I developed a deeper capacity for love (and patience) that I never knew.

3 month old Gavin. August 14, 2010

Then I felt that twinge that something was missing. I started moving more. Exercising. Running. Strength training. Felt good. Got strong. Ran long.

Gigi and I at Lake Elizabeth : ) July 14, 2009

After all that, there was still something missing that I could not readily put my finger on. Then one day, about two years ago, it hit me. I WAS LONELY.

 

I thought, how could I possibly be lonely? I have work outside of being a mom, a supportive husband, family, and friends. Then I dissected the issue: being a full time mom is lonely. The friends in my inner circle are solid, time-tested, love-them-to-pieces, but logistically unavailable. My family although available, were not going through the same life stage I was, so being able to relate was an issue. Plus, family and friends seemed dis-interested in going with me to kid-centered outings. Since I consider myself an active and fun mom, my favorite thing to do is to do stuff with my kids. How wonderful would it be to do stuff with other moms and their kids close to home?!

So I got to work and went to the best place to find me some friends: the internet. The first group I tried was a faith-based mom's group. Very nice women. They had on the spot childcare during meetings which I thought was cool. In the end, two things turned me off: (1)  the price to add to group was a couple hundred every couple months. What the heck? I don't want friends that bad  (2) it just didn't feel like a good fit. The group also reminded me of the forced bonding common in college sororities. Kinda fake. I didn't like that.

Back to the drawing board I went. During my search I found MeetUp.com. I found a mom's group that had a hundred plus members and only cost $5 to get in. I also liked how you needed to go to an orientation meeting before your membership was accepted. Great security feature I thought. I went to my first meeting and found out about all the fun things this group organizes. Play date galore!!

I went to a bunch of play dates and slowly started getting to know certain moms. Developing mom and kid friendships is not easy because (1) the moms have to vibe and (2) so do their kids. If either one of these conditions is not met, the friendship may not be viable.

My tribe :) October 19, 2013

I quietly for prayed for some mom friends. I also quietly prayed for fitness buddies. It was a slow process, but now I look around and BAM! I have both :-) What I love about developing and nurturing friendships with like-minded individuals is that very often, you find that you share common values, goals, and dreams. This multi-level-connection coupled with logistical availability is a sweet recipe for deeply-rooted-friendships. And what a tremendous blessing my friends have been to me !!

This post is dedicated to my little tribe of wonderful mothers. From left to right: Kiscelle, Daisy, Linda, Petra, Adria, & Tina (not pictured). You all complete me! ;-) 


So...

And realize that...

May you all have a charmed & blessed week!

See my FitChick story here: http://www.1runwithheart.com/2013/09/my-triathlon-journey.html

Healthy kids

The thing I love most about being a mom is doing stuff with my kids.

We especially enjoy being active outdoors. The cool, sunny, Fall weather was calling us to come out to play. 

So we did!

First Gavin and I had breakfast with our friends Adria and her adorable daughter Alana.

We headed to our favorite park and brought our bikes along.

Gigi was quite the helper, first showing Gavin how to pedal.

And sharing her bike with a new friend and pushing her along as she learned to pedal.

Then some tree climbing and general park play.

I relish the fun and bonding I have with my growing children. Experiencing my kid's firsts and celebrating the acquisition of new skills, confidence, fills me with love, pride, & purpose. 

Have a good week friends!

The Little Things

Thankful for the little things today...

Gavin waited all morning so that he could share his freshly baked gummy-bear-laden-cookies with Gigi (until we picked her up from school). He wanted to give her a treat and "surprise" her.

And later he ate all his veggies (first) during dinner!

Last, but not least, I found this picture of us that Gigi kept under her pillow. Such a sweetheart :-)

Gavin's First Day of Preschool

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Our essential selves

The thing I love about running is its simplicity.

You don't need make up, a personal trainer, a class, or equipment. Just some clothes and shoes, and you're good to go.

This is as bare-bones as an activity can get and I love that through my training I know I can tough out almost any condition nature throws out at me. Most recently I've ran in icy conditions, rainy conditions, tropical conditions, and at home to more temperate weather.

Moreover, I have very positive memories and associations with specific runs. Like the 10+ miler I ran a year or so ago to the mall and went shopping. Or 13+ miler with girlfriends I adore. Or the tremendously hilly 10k I ran with my husband that I nearly quit. Or the 5k obstacle course that reminded me how afraid I am of  heights. Or the very first race I ever completed: a full marathon at 26.2 miles in Honolulu. I could go on and on...

The gist of this post is that running (outdoors not the dang dreadmill) is more than exercise to me. It is going out and being part of nature. It is a form of active meditation. Most importantly it is a means for my subconscious to make its desires known. And lastly, it is a sure-fire way for me to hear what my essential self wants.

As such, recent events have me tabling my training plan for spontaneity. As long as my mileage is within a certain range and I throw in an easy run, a tempo, and a long run, I feel good. Wait not just good but strong and wholesome. In every way.

The intelligent and like-able Martha Beck defines our "essential selves" as who we are at our very core. The quiet voice inside of us who steers us to safety, happiness, and contentment. In contrast our "social selves" is our outer shell that we use to interface with the world. The intention of our "social selves" can be muddied with other people's expectations of us. Again, according to Beck, the way we find true contentment (which she defines as our "North Star") is to have our essential selves and social selves exist harmoniously.

Here's a link to the book I'm talking about:

http://www.amazon.com/Finding-Your-Own-North-Star/dp/0812932188

About two weeks ago during my long run at Coyote Hills, I kept hearing in my head "I am athlete." Being attuned to my individual intuition I knew this to be my essential self asserting itself, quietly but clearly. And of course, she was right on cue, while on a long run doing my favorite activity in my favorite place at that.

The first thought I had was Geez, my essential self has poor grammar, LOL. But as always that little voice was spot on. Most recently, I have been feeling, acting, and thinking like an athlete. And you know what? I like it. I like it a dang lot.

To me, as a runner, life is one big run. There are hills, ditches, flat terrain, rocky terrain and hey, don't forget mother nature. Sometimes she is a m/f'r. JK. Not really.

What I'm saying is this: keep running. Or moving or walking or dancing or ujamming or biking or swimming. Whatever floats your boat, just keep moving. And most importantly MOVE FORWARD.

There will be excruciating hills. But there will also be bliss. Embrace them all and you will emerge stronger, wholesome, and content.

No matter what m/f'rs throw at you, you will come out on top.

Just listen to that small voice.

You'll be happy you did.

I know I am.

Have charmed and blessed week, friends.

= )

Aulani Photobook

Cuties at the Honolulu Airport ;D

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The Big Daddy Post: 2012 in Review (12/5/12 update)

Dear Blog,

It is 3 am and I heard this post calling to me: "Check off something on this list!" FINE!


Racing
Bay to Breakers 10k-
Stanford Scamper 5k- TO WRITE
See Jane Run Half Marathon- TO WRITE
Kids for Sports 5k- TO WRITE


12/5/12

I am writing this post on the living room floor while the kids are asleep and my messy kitchen is calling me.

But, I did promise I'd be back today so here I am.

Blogging is hard. Kinda like running but for the mind. You need to get warmed up. Here's the update.

KIDDIES 

Hot off the press. Taken earlier this morning 12/5/12 :)

Gigi's & Gavin's developmental progress

School:

When I picked up Gigi and Gavin from school today their school director asked to have a word with me. CRAP! I'm in trouble. Or Gigi or Gavin. But that was not the case, let me explain.

Gavin started school in late September and surprisingly acclimated very well. Very little crying and right before school he is always excited to go.

But, we've figured out why. He has become Gigi's shadow at school. Whatever she does, wherever she is, lil bro wants to be there.

No wonder their teachers are always complimenting her on how good of a big sister she is. She's always there. It is great to see that she is so nurturing. Showing him how to do "work" (Montessori lingo for a selected activity) while her time for learning is compromised.


So the school director informed me that they are going to be more strict with Gavin and separate him from Gigi. She mentioned that he may not "like" coming to school because of this temporarily. I told her that she has my full support and that when at home I will talk to him about "being a big boy" and doing his own work.

Academically, Gigi is beginning to read short words phonetically. Gavin is able to follow directions and do age-appropriate work.

12/4/12

Emerging personalities

Both of my little ones are very sweet but Gigi is more generous with affection while Gavin doles it out to his inner circle.

The two play well together until someone pisses the other off (90% of the time it is Gavin). He reminds me of a puppy in that he hasn't fully learned what socially acceptable behavior is. But, I have to point out that he's only 2.5 and he toggles between Terrible Two'ing and Terrific Two-ing in the blink of an eye. Plus he's a boy. I'm sure that with school, him maturing, and consistent disciplining at home, our pup will eventually learn ;D

Gigi on the other hand is a little lady at 4.5. Today I was telling her a story about a super hero family that eats super hero food and when they eat their food they get super powers. The power she was gifted was being able to "glamour" people (True Blood reference which means to control people's mind/actions). The way she would glamour was by touching the person's eyes. She touched my eyes and said "Mommy you will always be with us. You will never get hurt and bleed. You will always be strong."

Awwwwww.www.www.

Gigi's 4th & Gavin's 5th Birthdays

Taken on Gigi's 4th birthday, 6/2/12

For their birthdays we kept it small and it was nice. Gigi had a craft birthday party at Our Paper Place in Newark with her cousins about 8-10 classmates, a local scrap-booking store. (Which reminds me I miss crafting. Gotta squeeze that in sometime soon.)

Taken on Gavin's 2nd birthday, 5/12/12

Gavin's birthday fell on a cousin's wedding day so we spent the morning and afternoon with my brother Erle's family at Happy Hollow Park & Zoo in San Jose. We went to Oz & Marcie's wedding that evening and surprisingly behaved extremely well.

Yay. Checking off these topics on my list below.

Goodnight!

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12/4/12

It has been an embarrassing amount of time since my last entry.

You have been put in the back burner because life has been so busy. Not to worry, it is the good kind of busy. I hope you understand.

In an effort to make up for lost time (and to check off all the items on my to-write list ) I am creating this "Big Daddy Post: 2012 in Review."

The year is coming to a close and I really want to document the most important things I've learned because life just zips by too quickly.

*Zip* Did you feel that? You just aged.

*Zip again* Its gonna be 2013 in less than a month.

Alright!

Let's get to it! ;D

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Racing
Bay to Breakers 10k- TO WRITE
Stanford Scamper 5k- TO WRITE
See Jane Run Half Marathon- TO WRITE
Kids for Sports 5k- TO WRITE

Social
Mom's groups, playdates 9-17-12  , & community- TO WRITE
Book Club 10/11/12

Girlie Outings-TO WRITE

Travel
Aulani 2012: travel planning-  9/19/12, activity breakdown, recommendations, & reflections-- TO WRITE
Las Vegas 2012: travel planning, activity breakdown, recommendations, & reflections- TO WRITE
Disneyland 2012: travel planning, activity breakdown, recommendations, & reflections- TO WRITE

Other
PROact training- TO WRITE
Personal challenges/hurdles- TO WRITE
Planning system & fortune making- TO WRITE

Blog Housekeeping
Organize blog articles by themes/groups- TO DO
Create standalone pages by themes/groups to allow for easier navigating within the site-TO DO
Network with other niche bloggers-TO DO